The Successful Coach

Christine Meyer

14

Are you the type of person who overcomplicates things? Did you know that you can still get to your destination while living playfully and joyfully?

As humans, we have this sense of accomplishment, looking for acknowledgment from others and prove our worthiness. This is what complicates things.

There is always a joyful or playful approach to life. It does not mean you’re wrong or unworthy, we just have to accept that it’s what we can live and intended for when we were born. Stop contradicting, along the way you’re getting indicators, you just have to acknowledge them and follow them. If you’re resistant out of nature and you’re doing out of proving, you’ll just keep repeating that pattern. Everything is responding to the theme of your thought.

It’s not about the action, it’s about coming into alignment with what you desire, finding a way to feel better than you are, and feel good consistently. You can be tired sometimes but it is not what you want to keep focusing on, you have the choice. Life is a journey of new discoveries.

A bit about Christine:

Christine coaches thought leaders and influencers who are deeply interested in confidently creating their life through the masterful understanding of their own empowerment. Her clients are passionate, life-loving humans who already have a track record of success, who understand that coaching is not a luxury and that hiring her will exponentially affect their lives in powerful and positive ways.

Where you can find them:
Website: https://www.christinemeyercoaching.com/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christinemeyercoaching/

Where you can listen to this episode:
iTunes
Stitcher
Spotify
YouTube

Christine Meyer 0:02

I'm so tired, and it doesn't mean that you can't be tired. Let's lay that right now. Because some people hear this conversation and, "So I can't be tired, and I can't feel." No, that's not it at all. It just recognizes, "I'm so tired. All right, then what must be going on with me? What am I focusing on?" It's what you're focusing on that's making you tired or exhausted or feeling beat down or whatever it is. You can be exhausted. Sure, go ahead. But is that what you want to keep focusing on, and you have the choice?

Doug Holt 0:30

Hello, everybody, and welcome back. We have a fantastic guest here. I'm so excited. It's Christine Meyer. Christine, she's a life coach whose mission is to empower, uplift, and educate those that may not know. She believes that everyone can joyfully and playfully live. And that no apologies ever are required for that, which I love that process. Christine, thank you so much for being here with us.

Christine Meyer 0:54

Thank you. Thanks for having me.

Doug Holt 0:56

Absolutely. We've had some great conversations offline, and it has been fantastic to get to know you. And I've read your book, and we talk about which is Keep It Simple Smarty Pants, which is kind of what we're going to talk about today, which is a perfect tagline here. Let's talk about your experience coaching over the years, and you've got a lot of experience with it. What is it that people tend to do that gets them in the way?

Christine Meyer 1:24

Overcomplicate things? People tend to overanalyze, overthink, make up stories, and then dig themselves into a hole and then don't know why they can't get out. Or they think that they need to get into a hole, figure out how they got into the hole, and then somehow crawl their way back out. So I think that for most people that I've ever coached, they overcomplicate and overthink, overanalyze things.

Doug Holt 1:57

I used to fall into the latter category.

Christine Meyer 2:00

I used to.

Doug Holt 2:03

I caught myself there. And I've gone the other way since. But it's been a while, and training with Biocybernaut helped me with that. But I was one that, as a business leader in business, I would get my significance by building things and overcoming adversity that no one thought was possible. Coming through, do you find that to be a common trait?

Christine Meyer 2:25

Sure. Because there's, for humans, in general, we tend to have this sense of accomplishment if we've overcome, and why try to overcome why not just get there? Why not keep it simple and just get there. But there's this element of drama, the emotional drama that people tend to enjoy. And to some people, it's better to feel something which could be negative emotion and drama, versus joyfully, playfully live? That seems too easy. We must have to earn something different. We must have to make it, shouldn't we? And all the movies and many of the books are about that.

Doug Holt 3:02

Yeah, it's kind of you got to hustle, right? You have to hustle, gotta work 24/7 or 25/8, right, which doesn't exist. And always grind it out.

Christine Meyer 3:13

And prove your worthiness and to yourself and others earn it. Earn the earned validation in the eyes of others. And really, it truly is that it is over complicating it. And it's based on false premises that somewhere along the way got started when someone didn't achieve what they wanted. And they tried to figure out why. And then we all tend to overthink and overstressed and over analyze those things. And proved our worthiness when that's never in question. We're human. There's no more important purpose than being alive and sorting your own life, outliving your life joyfully. Is that just too easy? That's just too easy, right?

Doug Holt 3:55

Yeah. It is too easy.

Christine Meyer 3:57

Yeah. How can that ever be satisfying to live joyfully? I don't know.

Doug Holt 4:03

Yeah, you seem to be doing it. Wait a minute.

Christine Meyer 4:06

Yeah, I am for the most part, doesn't mean I don't overcomplicate things, doesn't mean I don't spend my little wheel sometimes. But I know what I want and intend and keep setting my setpoint. It is to live joyfully playfully because it's never wrong when you're not. We are human beings observing our conditions around us and playing with people, which isn't always playing, so it seems in relationships. Still, there's always a lively, playful approach to life. And it doesn't mean that you're wrong or bad or unworthy or undeserving, or any of that when you're not experiencing that. It's just how we just learn to accept that is what we can live and what we intended to experience when we were born rather than struggle and suffer and take a beating here and hit yourself over the head and all of those things.

Doug Holt 5:10

Which is great. And I know I've done an exercise. I'm sure you've seen it to where you say you list all the emotions you can think of. And I think I'm making this up relatively roughly correct. Where the average person has 5x negative emotions, they write down versus positive emotions.

Christine Meyer 5:29

Yeah, absolutely. But to understand that a little bit more, let's keep it simple here, there are ranges of emotions. The premise that I always come from the ranges, there's a range, and that you're human, you're human. Like they're a bunch of rooms in a house, are there any wrong rooms? No, they're just a bunch of rooms. So there's a range of emotions. And when you hang around a certain range, it's easier for you to think thoughts and feel repeated emotions. Because you get in this loop, and you get in this loop, and you get in this loop. So it's way easier for you to stay where you have been, for the most part, than it is to start another loop. And that is because you attract, like your thoughts, your thoughts attract, and the essence of what you're thinking about. So if you're hanging around in frustration, and then what you rendezvous with, what you come across. What happens in your life or comes at you what feels like it comes at you is often equivalent to frustration. You're not going to experience much beyond that.

And so people from their makeup stories and saying, "This thing frustrates me" or "I'm annoyed at this," or now it's easier to start thinking about all the other things that are annoying and frustrating, and all the people in your life are bad. It's a set point that feels more challenging to move beyond because you keep attracting the same experiences and the same kind of people with the same emotions. You keep reacting to your life in the way that you have been. So you have to, you have to move beyond that you have to decide I want to feel better. At some point, I want to feel better, and then do the things meaning, yes, take some actions, but it's not all about action. Primarily, first and foremost is how I can perceive this? What do I think about this? How can I see this situation that I'm mostly reacting to it from frustration? Just let's that's a good place where a lot of people hang around and be less frustrated? How can I feel better about this? How can I feel better about this, and then that emotional journey, then is more in your charge? And when you start to see it differently. Now you can feel differently when you feel differently. That lets you know that you're in the point of attracting different situations and circumstances. But it does take some focus on your part to decide more often how you want to feel.

Doug Holt 8:10

So you have a chapter in your book that is reality doesn't happen to you. Right? I thought it was a fantastic title to a chapter and unit share the same philosophy here. But I can also imagine a lot of our audience are coaches, right? They're successful coaches, but maybe they haven't gotten to Christine's status yet. And they're working on it. So there's that frustrating road that comes into starting your first coaching business, as you may or may not have achieved, experienced, what would you say to them and applying this type of filter to the situation?

Christine Meyer 8:41

Reality doesn't happen to you? That filter? Well, I think that no matter what it is, the premise is always you're creating your reality. And the thoughts that you often think, consistently the beliefs you have, are habitual. You have done things a long time ago, and keep thinking or that you started yesterday, and you think again today because they're there. If you're starting a coaching business, you can be thinking or believing that it's hard to get clients. You can be excited about your business in one aspect and whatnot aspect of it, and you can think, but it's hard to get clients. Well, that's a contradiction right there. That's a vibrational contradiction. Yep. So if you believe that it's hard to get clients, you're excited about your business, but you believe it's hard to get clients. So at some point, you're going to have to acknowledge that there's sort of a sticking point right there. What could you think that could feel better? Or are you excited about starting an online course?

Where are you going to get the people or "Gosh, I'm brand new, who's going to pay me?". Do you see all of the contradictory thoughts? And it's not about getting all tied up and bothered by the contradictory thoughts, but it is about paying attention to how you feel. So if things are a little rougher than you need them to be or want them to be, if it's taking a little longer than you want it to be, it's not panning out so well; quite simply, it is that you have some contradictions in there. And so it's great to address them, not to dig them up. And, and it's just more like, "Well, what would I rather believe," and you're not going to start believing something different right away. But it is a practice, and you catch yourself in the act of doing it. Oh, this is going to be hard. "Wait a minute. Okay, that doesn't feel good at all. What would I rather believe? I'd rather believe that it could be easier, not maybe not easy. Maybe I don't believe it can be easy, but I'd rather believe that it could be easier." That's a step in that direction you want to go, like if you identified a place on a map. Maybe the map is dating me.

Doug Holt 10:57

Okay, I'm with you.

Christine Meyer 10:58

Alright, let's go with that one that or you could substitute ways, right? Ways in there, and you tell directions or your map, you're going to a certain destination, let's say Colorado, and you're starting here in Pennsylvania. Well, it's quite clear to me. I have decided that's where I want to go. I want to build a coaching business. I want to coach business, right. So that's my destination. I don't know exactly the routes I'm going to take. And I don't know exactly how long they'll be on each route. But I'm going to keep pointing myself in that direction. Ways is going to show me the routes and get me to that destination of Colorado. And that is the thing when you start it on a path toward what you want when you've identified what you want. Even if it's not all that clear, I want a coaching business, but I don't know, I want to coach a group. I don't know if I want whatever, right? There are many elements that you can consider, and you might have preferences about.

But if you can identify something in the way that it feels like I'm in a coaching business that feels inspiring, helpful, beneficial to myself, and others win-win for everyone. Fulfilling, interesting, expansive, allowing all of those things, then no, you've identified something you want, you've gotten more specific by identifying how that would feel for you if you were living that or on your way to it. Now that you've identified that if you start contradicting, but I don't know-how. You just went off the path that told you the ways you wanted to go. Okay, so you're still in charge of this. Now you've looked at your map, and you saw that you had to go from this point to that point, and you just veered off. And so along the way, you're getting little indicator ways the same as you make a U-turn here or turn right or turn left, and you turn left instead of right. So those aren't, those are the things that I would discuss with anyone that I was talking to, if you have identified something that you want, you're going to be more aware of when you're pointing in a different direction because of how it feels now. And it's not going to feel good when you're moving in in a direction that's slightly off the path doesn't mean you can't get there. Just mean, that was a little over here. Over here, you're going over there, we over here.

Doug Holt 13:31

I think it makes complete sense to me. Yeah. And I've experienced this as a coach, as someone who used to coach more, but about six or seven years ago when I got my first six-figure client, right. And it was the talk in my head "But who's gonna pay over six figures" at the time for this... you name the story. And when I get in alignment with that value, there's a lot of ways to do it. But when I got in alignment with it energetically and logically, clients started contacting me. I didn't reach out there; I just started getting client after client after client willing to pay at that level of resigning, which gave me more validation.

Christine Meyer 14:15

Right, but you got there first.

Doug Holt 14:17

Yeah 100%

Christine Meyer 14:18

I vibrationally energetically, your energy was already there. No matter what it is, if you're not experiencing it now, there's some sort of bottleneck happening somewhere, and frankly, it's always you. It's not them, and it's not if, it's not that, it's not the environment. It's none of that. It's always you, it always starts with you, and it comes from you. And that doesn't make you wrong; that makes you a human being having experiences in your life, having come to some conclusions, or still discovering yourself because life is a journey of you discovering you, and so what if you stand in a place of desiring something, whatever that is, in this case, let's say a coaching business a successful very successful coaching business. You're not experiencing what you've labeled as success on your way. But what about success? What about the place you stand now? And seeing it as "Yay! I want something". "Yeah, I get to move towards something!" rather than a diminishment of your worthiness or a diminishment of your talent or diminishment of your value. But to your point, when we start reaching for those higher-paying clients, there's certainly some energetic work for us to do if we're not there yet. Sometimes that idea that desire for the higher paying clients, you take out energetically what you've already created, and then that idea comes to you, and you're like, "Yes, I'm there!". Sometimes, you identify something that you want that you are not yet up to speed with, and that's okay.

Doug Holt 15:59

Oh, and I couldn't agree more. And I just shared my experience because I recall that actual alignment happening. Feeling it, right? Stepping into just literally phone calls coming in, and emails coming in and what seems out of nowhere, right, as we all say, in life.

Christine Meyer 16:18

Right, and nothing is ever out of nowhere or out of the Oblivion or out of the blue can be out of the Oblivion, though. But it's never coming out of nowhere. You lined up with whatever that is. And therefore, it showed up because vibrationally, you are compatible. That's it. If you're not vibrationally compatible, you won't, you won't have that experience about anything.

Doug Holt 16:44

I love this conversation. I think there's a lot of listeners, coaches, and business leaders who are listening to this that are stuck, right and trying to figure out why they're stuck. And they get into the process of more doing right if I just do more. If I get up at 4 am at 3 am and do more work, then I'll get there.

Hi guys, I want to interrupt this show to tell you about the Biocybernaut Institute. Now the Biocybernaut Institute is the pioneer in neurofeedback training, helping you tune into Zen-like states in days, not decades. Now, Dr. Hart, the founder, has been doing research in brainwave feedback and training for over 40 years. And up until now, this has been the secret of great coaches and successful people such as Tony Robbins, Dr. Michael Beckwith, and many others. In fact, after doing my Alpha 1 Training at the biocybernaut Institute, I took a job with them. The first job I've had in over 20 years, I was impressed with my results and the results that I was seeing other people get; go over to Biocybernaut.com, which is Biocybernaut.com, to find out more information. Now let's get back to the show.

Christine Meyer 18:01

Yeah, I used to be married to a man who did that who got up at 3 am. 4 am and worked harder because that's how he thought he would accomplish something. But really, it's not about the action. Certainly, action contributes to your movement forward and, and energetically speaking. Also, if you're taking action, sometimes that's helpful to you for your alignment toward what you desire. But it is about first and foremost not working harder and struggling; it is about coming into alignment, which means, really, somehow finding a way to feel better than you are or feel good and continue to feel good consistently. Because again, everything is responding to the theme of your thoughts. It is, and that's worth taking the time. That's worth taking the time to decide that you're going to feel better. And when you catch yourself considering things that don't feel good. Now's not the time to consider it. And it's not the time to grind either. Because if you're grinding from that place of lack, if you're grinding from that place of trying hard, you're not in alignment. You're amplifying where you are and getting more of that. So no matter how hard you try, it'll seem like you're getting nowhere and spinning your wheels.

Doug Holt 19:19

Yeah, I love this, and the analogy could be let me know if I'm off on this. And having young kids, I've experienced this firsthand, is always saying, "Oh, I'm so tired." And that perpetuates the sense of being tired. You're always in the conversation of being tired.

Christine Meyer 19:36

Exactly. I'm so tired doesn't mean that you can't be tired. Let's lay that right out. Because some people hear this conversation tell us, we can't be tired, and I can't feel no that's not it at all. It just recognizes I'm so tired. All right, then what must be going on with me. What am I focusing on? What am I focusing on? Not because my kids are running around, not because I've got a million things to do or whatever, none of those are the reasons why you're feeling the way you are. It's your perception. It's what you're focusing on about that. That's making you tired or exhausted or, or feeling beaten down or whatever it is, and again, you can be tired. Sure, go ahead. But it's not what you want to keep focusing on, and you have the choice.

Doug Holt 20:21

Yes, oh, and against that choice of the analogy I used to use with coaching clients, and they'd say, Ah, I'm just worn out, or I'm tired. And I knew that they'd already done the proper resets of their sleep patterns, and all these things, the checklist going through was done, if I always ask them to ask myself that, if you won the lottery right now, would you go take a nap? Right?

Christine Meyer 20:45

Right, good one. I like that.

Doug Holt 20:46

If you would, you need to sleep. But yeah, otherwise, you got some reserves in there. We're talking about something psychological. Right? It doesn't have to be the lottery could be a lot of things. Right? Find your soulmate?

Christine Meyer 20:57

That's a good one. It gets to the point.

Doug Holt 20:59

Yes, and it just knocks it right out of the park, and you have this again. I keep referring to your books. I just read a lot of it. I loved applying the knowledge to doing. Right, which is a formula that as coaches that have been in the field for a long time, we talked about Be-Do-Have or most people go Have-Do-Be, right? When I have the right job, I can do the thing, and then I can get back. Right then, I can get the feeling that I want to feel good about myself, feeling excited, feeling successful when they get the whole formula backward.

Christine Meyer 21:37

Correct. You gotta feel about how you want to feel now, even without it. Oh, no, really? Yes, and then be it. And because feeling it, let where your vibrational status is also feeling it feels like you have it. And it's not about pretending and faking it till you make it? No. It's not about faking it till you're making it. It's not about making affirmations that you don't believe. It is about feeling it, really truly feeling it. And if you can't feel the way you want to feel, relative to something you want, that you don't have, then find a way to feel it about other things you already do have. Stop pointing out the gap, stop pointing out the missing, stop pointing out the lack, stop pointing out the pieces that aren't in place or justifying why you feel the way you do because there are all kinds of reasons we can use to justify why we feel. If we were standing in a room with 1000 people, probably 1000 of them would agree. You're right; yes, you are justified in feeling how you want to feel. But that's not the reason you're feeling that way. You're feeling that way because of your perspective of this, and you can feel that way. But does it feel good, does it? Maybe right now it does because feeling justified feels better than disempowering power. But how long do you want to be justifying for?

And where's justification coming from justification comes from the need to be validated, the need to be right, the need to prove yourself somehow. And it's like, what if you're already good? You've already, right? Not meaning as in there's a right for everyone. But meaning you are right and good where you are. And you are justified, and you were validated just for being you just for being a thinking breeding being born on this planet? And what if that's the premise now that you move forward and continue to include in your thoughts about anything that you think about? What if you're already working? What if you're already good and valued, and you don't need to prove anything? What would you? What would you do? How would you think and feel? And so back to your point about feeling and being and doing exactly because if you're trying to get to the doing first, you're still amplifying the vibration from which you're approaching it from so if you're resistant. You're doing that approving, and guess what, you're just gonna keep repeating that pattern.

Doug Holt 24:15

Yes. Oh, absolutely. I am coming through it. Now, as a coach, I'm going to go back a long time.

Christine Meyer 24:23

At the beginning of time.

Doug Holt 24:26

When you started as a coach, did you have these premises in place? Or were these things you've learned along your journey?

Christine Meyer 24:34

Well, like anything, I had premises in place, and I keep expanding. I learned every day, really still. Because the intricacies of this work that I do are the subtleties are endless. I learn every day. But were these things in place? Yeah. Has my coaching approach changed over the years? Not really, not that much. Really. The premises have always stayed the same, but how they can be applied and how people are sort of viewing them and how we can sort of straighten them up and eradicate, if you will, the false premises that keep coming in, that always evolved. And it's fascinating to me; I will never stop learning about this work that I do.

Doug Holt 25:27

Yeah, that's great. I mean, you, you're a coach, right? You're promoting coaching the benefits of it, and you are a product of what you're putting out there, right? Yeah, you don't want to go to a restaurant where the chef doesn't eat? Yeah, I was actually in a conversation the other day with somebody who happened to be a very wealthy individual. And he was asking me, if Doug, looking for a coach, I'm not the right fit for this person. And he said, "Well, what should I do? What should I be looking for," and you need to find my opinion. You need to find a coach that has a coach. And it could be in a gap period, but they need to be doing some kind of coaching or training themselves because they can't see their blind spots. They always want to sharpen the saw, so to speak, use Stephen Covey's terminology, and keep improving upon themselves. So it's great to hear that you're doing that, not shocked at all, but you're doing that as well?

Christine Meyer 26:19

Well, again, we're always evolving. And, sure, I'm a coach promoting coaching. I think it's really valuable and important and helpful because you can spend on your sand often and not be able to see beyond that. So that's helpful. But I think that we all have guidance, and in the simplest form than if you don't, if you don't have a coach, the best way to be coached is to pay attention to how you feel truly, and desire to feel better to feel improvement. I'm not saying you always have to feel good. I'm saying, if you're not feeling good, you have a desire to feel better, which we all do, which we all do, but consciously make that decision. And then and then guide yourself, use that map. Is that going in the direction of feeling better when I think that or focus on that? Or is that going in the opposite direction of where I said I wanted to go? So again, yes, 100%, to coaches. And also, if you don't have one, that doesn't make you wrong or bad or incapable of achieving what you want because we all have our own best coach ever, truly, which is our guidance system.

Doug Holt 27:27

I love it. Great. And as you're, as you're looking through the evolution of your business, and that you've grown as a successful coach, are there any, I would say cornerstone moments or things that have come up, that have shifted the way that you've looked at the business of coaching.

Christine Meyer 27:48

I think that the business of coaching is always evolving. I think that coaching from when I started, especially life coach, coaching for athletes is sort of a common thing is like an accepted thing. And something that many people, if not all, for most, for the most part, would see the benefit of I get that I'm going to be helpful for me to get a coach. So I think that part of the evolution that I've seen since I started was that people didn't know what a life coach was and didn't see the value a long time ago. So it's been a journey and then and fun to see the advancement of that evolution. And I think it's time for us all to just be the coach that we are versus trying to be the coach that anyone else is. There might be some proven techniques meaning you build a course and you sell it online, or you do this, or you do that, or you do that. We have to find your preferences and how you work and the best that's going to bring the best out of you. So I've seen that over the years that I've been coaching, is more acceptance of coaches and kind of an influx of coaches and then the comparisons versus being that the choice of how do you want to coach who do you want to coach and kind of doing it your way however that is

Doug Holt 29:45

I love it. I love it. This goes back to what I was reading about your bio is everyone can joyfully playfully live and that no apology is ever required for that. Right

Christine Meyer 29:57

Yeah. And again, like anything, I think that it's easy to get into the comparison game. And think that because someone else is doing it that way that you need, I like to take ideas or things that other people are doing and prefer to make that inspiring or stimulate ideas for myself, but still bring it into Well, what fits for me rather than I need to do the thing that everyone else is doing in the way that they're doing it. I think that there are a lot of coaches out there now. So you gotta be you and own it.

Doug Holt 30:31

Yeah, absolutely. One of the things that I've always enjoyed about our conversations is you and I share the same belief in using the same word. But then it all starts at understanding our emotions, understanding our mindsets, and modifying the beliefs, the underlying currents that are running the show there. And I find that to be unusual with many newer coaches coming into the scene in the world of coaching, whether it be business coaching, well, it could be athletic coaching for that matter, right? The athlete needs to be in mental clarity, the mental state to get the right performance or best, or life coaching. And it is getting to that root of what's going on.

Christine Meyer 31:09

And what you want. I don't know if you've checked out my website, but I speak more to what you want? Versus, what's the problem? What do you want? Versus Where do you think you're stuck? What do you want? Where do you want to go? Because I'd rather call someone to that place that their soul is already calling them to, versus keep pointing at where you are, and making that emphasis? No, sometimes you can't get people to make that correlation. But I will guarantee you that everyone on the planet can resonate with a desire that they have and be called toward it and feel inspired toward it because that's where I would want you to be as a client. Okay, so you're where you're at. You're in Pennsylvania, and you want to go to Colorado. Okay, great. That's a doable journey. Awesome.

Doug Holt 32:02

Yeah.

Christine Meyer 32:05

Just go wherever you want to go and great, that's okay, great information. But it's irrelevant. It doesn't, and it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Because where you are now is where you are now. But you can move someplace else. So yeah, I might have gone off on the answer to that, but just go anywhere with these conversations?

Doug Holt 32:23

Well, that's the beauty of it. Right? It's just a conversation. Yeah. And what I hear you say, and I agree, is many people get stuck in the past, and I'll call it victimhood. Although people don't see it that way often, my past story is my reality. When truly we can author our story at every moment, every day, whatever it may be, right now, that every decision we get to decide what it means to us and what we get to do and act.

Christine Meyer 32:53

Right. As I said, right now, I heard that the voices also say, but you can't change it right now. Right now and change it and have it changed. But it is it again, in which direction are you going to move in? Can you change your story, modify your story a little bit today? And then again, tomorrow and the next day? And like I said in my book, let's say you're standing on one side of a 20-foot stream, and you want to get to the other side of the 20-foot stream. That's doable. But if I say to you, "Doug, I want you to get from this side to that side and jump," you say, "What are you nuts?" And I say, "No, do it!" And you say, "No, I'm going to fall flat faced flat in the water. That's not gonna work". And say, "Well, how are you going to get over there? It must be impossible then." And you say, "No, it's not impossible. I'm just going to go over, and I'm going to grab some stones, and I'm going to put them across the stream. And eventually I'll be there". And so that is that but to the point of the story is, you're not going to change. I think that we all get tired of the coaches, myself included , about myself with my saying, "Well, you could change your story now," "Well, you can start, you can start changing your story. Now.", "You can start modifying your story, and you can start evolving your story, you can start telling a different story, one that feels slightly better." But what I'm never saying to you is to jump that 20-foot stream.

Doug Holt 34:23

Interesting. I like that. I love that analogy.

Christine Meyer 34:26

Because otherwise, it's going to be impossible. And you're going to say, "But I can't." And then you will, of course, you can't. Nobody can jump a 20-foot string. Of course, you can't. But guess what, there are stepping stones that you can go pick up over here and over here and over here and put one down and step on and stay there for a while. And then, when you get steady on that stone, you modify your story a little bit. Or you can do it in 10 minutes doesn't matter. But, again, that leeway and understanding of if you've got the momentum going in one direction you're going to face, you're going to plan. If you try and change that whole story altogether, you're gonna feel like a failure. And that's not the point. The point is, is you can get there; you can get there from here but in baby steps.

Doug Holt 35:15

I mean, the key is, like you said, you got to know what you want, which is getting across the river. And then you get to take action, whether it be one stone, or you're carrying three boulders, either way, you pick up that stone, and then you sit with that new reality.

Christine Meyer 35:27

The action, more than anything, the primary action that I always focus on, is how do you focus on the thoughts you're thinking or choose right now that feel better? They don't have to feel outrageously joyful and playful. It's just, I felt past, and now I feel a little less pissed. Yeah. That's, that's the journey. That's the point. Then, keep feeling a little less past and keep feeling a little better and a little better and a little better. And eventually, you're going to feel awesome. And you're going to be over on the other side of the street.

Doug Holt 36:00

Love it. Absolutely. Christine, you've been so generous with your time; where can people find out more about you and your book?

Christine Meyer 36:08

My book, keep it simple, Smarty Pants is on Amazon.com. And on my website, it's also there. There's a slight small download that you're allowed to have through Amazon. And on my website, www.ChristineMeyerCoaching.com

Doug Holt 36:27

Excellent. Christina and everybody else is listening. We'll put that in the show notes. Again, Christina. I love what you do. I love your philosophy. And I just keep going out there and helping people. Thanks so much for being here.

Christine Meyer 36:36

Thanks for having me. It was a lot of fun.

Doug Holt 36:39

Thank you for joining us at The Successful Coach podcast. Please hit like and subscribe so we can bring you more great interviews like these. Until next time, have an amazing day.

Interested in working together? Fill out an application